oh my eyes hurt. 5 half hours of sleep the night before and a long day in school. 13 hrs with 9 hours of lessons. probably a personal record. 11 hours of lessons this week and there goes 9. 5 hours of french is really amazing. good thing it's not another subject placed at the end of the day. at least i can stay away through french. and i realised that it's the only module now where the professor knows our names. everything else is so detached and foreign. might as well be reading from a textbook.

and a few of us came out from lesson near 9pm, were walking towards central library, and we walked past this bench and heard this woman and guy having a conversation. and she said "...le déjeuner, le dîner avec le prof...". after 5 hrs of french, and in the middle of the night, out of the blue you hear people talking like that, for a moment you'll wonder if your senses are working properly. freaky. very freaky.

and i think i must be crazy to copy out Kreb Cycle pathway during lecture. during an unrelated lecture where i was bored because the lecturer was not very entertaining, and i would have fallen asleep. and i managed to fill up an A4 page with it. including some of the mechanisms. ah well i suppose that sort of thing entertains me greatly. if i had a bigger piece of paper, and more time, i would include more cycles and more mechanisms, but ah well. perhaps another day when i'm that bored.

Biochemistry.

8 Nov - CA 2
9 Nov - last lecture of the semester
18 Nov - final exam

!?!?!?!?!?!

fire fire! so unexcitingly exciting.

1.45pm me reaches blk S2. nothing to do, too early, naps on bench outside lab.
1.50pm fire alarm goes off. nothing else seems to happen other than irritating alarm(yeah i know it's designed to be irritating.
1.55pm Dr Darren Yeo walking around talking to someone and confirming that it's a real fire. he speaks in a normal conversation tone. and darren yeo says, let's get out. then walks abit. then he says we just leave the students here like that ah, call them to go too.
so we all reluctantly, boringly, walk briskly out of the place. it still looks like a boring hot afternoon without nothing happening.
we go downstairs, cross the linkway to S1. hm, can smell burning stuff. okay.. fine. go to this carpark, and then can see smoke coming from bottom of building. ah even more exciting now.
then campus security arrives, in their car. yay. and they go into the building. do dunno what. prob did nothing. anyway din see anything happen. smoke stopped though. so maybe they did do something to the fire. alarm keeps ringing. nothing happens. bored....
2.20pm two fire-bikes arrive. finally! after 20 mins. wonder why it took so long. wow. everyone so excited. finally there's some action. ok then, the two guys get off, go in. and promptly comes back and put on their gear. which takes forever. and the three more guys come up from somewhere below(ze carpark was not at ground floor), one yellow dressed boss. then they all go in. and alarm stops! wow. but nothing else visible happens. ah well. lala. then me goes to see where those extra firefighters came from. and voila, one whole line of red vehicles downstairs. one white hazmat lorry too. and one normal fire engine, two/three other different but not that impressive ones. and one red car between them. after that boring uneventful thing, we were wondering why they mobilised a whole SCDF army to come and do nothing. well they were really slacking around and doing nothing. the firefighters din stay in there for very long. shrug. think there wasn't much of a fire for them to entertain themselves with. but they were still investigating for some time. still particularly amused with the army of red vehicles. and this is my first real fire. yeah. even though i didn't get to see the fire. my greatest disaster ever, probably. other than lightning storms. and i wasn't even in any danger of dying, so sad. maybe they were suspicious of that roomful of liquid nitrogen nearby. or the abundance of excitable chemicals in the science fac.
well we went back to lesson at 3.30. and i realiesd that the whole S2 block only had us having lessons. and there weren't many staff around as well. so empty. but that place always seems empty, wonder why.
fire fire

Professor Sydney Brenner.
im not like someone, who oogles at the his eyebrows. yeah, first thing i liked about him was his way of speech. i like it when people have alot to say and can't wait to say it all. but he must be so used to giving speeches.
he talks, non-linearly, which is very important to me. his sentences, are long, have many sections, many constructs, many loopbacks, many add-on points.
his jokes, why are they funny? they are just little annecdotes on real-life happenings. they contain the balance of seriousness, joviality and twist to make it a little laugh. i absolutely dislike prepared jokes, because, simply because they mean nothing. there is no worth in laughing at something infantile and pointless.

abt ppl who embarrass themselves. one would muse in disbelief at what one could possibly encounter in this world. one wonders deeply. it's one thing to hear about someone doing something stupid, it's another thing to see it actually happen. in disbelief. it's, really, shocking. i liken it to learning that 1+1=3 is wrong. and after many years more of education, seeing someone actually stand up and ask if 1+1 is equal to 3.
i don't know what to feel. perhaps, perhaps it's like after all that pressure that those overseas scholars in nus mugging so hard, u find out that some of them are probably not as smart in other aspects of life.
the title of the lecture was "How to win a nobel prize". and there were actually people who, during the Q&A, asked how to win, asked whether what they did was right. one guy even asked sth like, i've got this cure, can i get a nobel prize. some cure for hypertension, if i din hear wrongly. it was only at his 2nd or 3rd repeating that i deduced it was a hypothetical situation. alors, i allow some possibility of misunderstanding due to translation problems.
sigh. wasn't it obvious. wasn't the title just a little joke. didn't anyone understand. didn't they understand. all his jokes abt winning nobel prize, all the ribbing, all the references. i then realised people actually came expecting an answer on how to win a nobel prize. someone even asked how they select someone to win, hah. *shakes head*
particularly surprised that he openly denounced creationism's fight against Evolution. amused. well, guess he's above the argument, untouchable, immunity. amused amused. science and religion. unfortunately: No Comment.
which of course, one might infer, No Comment = taking one particular side of the argument. there's not really a middle ground. just that it gives the appearance of a middle ground. or perhaps a refusal to declare one's stand is a way of declaring it without giving opportunity/evidence for accusation.
amused amused. what a long post.

the motive of these posts today, if you're wondering...
is
to induce some thoughts in people. is to, break free of the monotonous boring life that people seem to be living. to depart from the standard topics of conversation and post.

to show, that reality is only reality. and the imaginations are still there, if you can find it.
do not be trapped by the books and lined words and solid buildings.

see beauty in the approaching storm, see everything in your mind.


or perhaps, i am simply just distracted from another project report. just another digression. of course i don't think about all the crap above while i'm writing those things. perhaps just another over-in-depth literary dissection and over-psychoanalysis of simple words.

cheers, everyone, it will rain.

you look up to the sky, and see dark clouds gathering
and you trudge up the steps
and you see the rain arriving, and you hurry on your way.

when all is done, and in the morning the sun shines again
and the grass has dried and flowers opened
and you blink your eyes and imagines the rain falling here the day before

wondering whether life will ever be the same again
or if not
did anything ever happy

Artist: Secret Garden
Album: Once in a Red Moon
Title: Silent Wings
&
Title: Greenwaves (a beautiful song.)

"image, our planet floating silently in space
around it, a white dove flies, forever circling
every 100 years, the dove's wing gently touches the face of the earth
the time it would take this feathered wing to wear this planet down to nothing,
is eternity"

Artist: Secret Garden
Title: Dawn of a New Century

perhaps a smile on the boy by the river
keeping watch on the revellers
singing drinking on the steamboat chugging by
perhaps a gaze of incomprehension, innocence
at its infancy.

he dances by the river, jagged tune in the breeze
he smiles in the sunshine, squirreled nuts in the trees
living in the world of him,
without language, without song,
but simply with life.

listening:
Artist: Secret Garden
Album : Dawn of a New Century
Title : Children of the River

meadowed grass by the river bank
a boy sitting on a fallen tree
shaving a branch with an old jackknife
perhaps a whistle it is to be

listen to the salmon swim
up the river pass the bank
swiftly pass the young boy's tears
up and away all these years

a gentle tune in the light spring breeze
thin yet lightly sorrow filled
which the wind morphs into a dance of spring
where sadness be gone and birds to sing

do not disturb the boy on the log
he writes his life as he knows
waiting for the salmon in the river
watching death come, and seeing life go




this is written just to remind me of the Idea.

tears tears and more tears and endless tears

i don't know what to say. i don't know how to say (that i cannot say). i don't know if i should say anything. i don't know if i should try to say. but the silence and waiting signifies that i should say something, that i need to say something, that i have to say something.

but i cannot say something wrong. but i cannot find something to say. but i have to say something.

this is not for you. nor you, nor you. for no one, to no one. no, not you still.

for i who is giving up hope, why come and tell me i am wrong in giving up hope, why tell me that i am still wrong. there are just more wrongs.

don't reply, don't comment, don't say anything. just don't. this is really not for you, not for anyone.

"a baby's cells can cross the blood-brain barrier, into the mother's brain. Though it is known that foetal cells do enter the mother's bloodstream during pregnancy, foetal cells crossing the protective layer into the brain is scientifically proven for the first time."

http://www.nus.edu.sg/corporate/research/gallery/research38.htm

good luck to all future mothers.

40% of people with HIV/Aids have neurological symptoms.

brains of the Aids patients studied were 15% thinner.

However, at least two in five living with HIV/Aids will suffer from cognitive impairments, ranging from minor deficits to dementia, studies suggest.

the Aids patients had 10-15% thinner brain regions, including areas called the primary sensory, motor and premotor cortices, regardless of whether they were taking anti-HIV drugs or not.

link

Mosquito with glowing gonads to help battle malaria
14:06 10 October 2005
NewScientist.com news service
Kurt Kleiner
09 August 2005

A genetically engineered mosquito with glowing gonads could become a new weapon in
the battle against malaria. Researchers at Imperial College London created the mosquito by attaching a gene for fluorescence found in jellyfish to a gene expressed only in a male mosquito’s sexual organs. The technique makes it relatively simple to distinguish males from females, something that has previously hindered malaria-eradication strategies. One way to control disease-carrying mosquitoes is to flood an area with millions of sterile males. They mate with the females but produce no offspring, so the insect population drops. The technique has helped control the Mediterranean fruit fly (Ceratitis capitata), for instance.

hmmm, even though it's easier to smack them if they glow, i suppose we shouldn't whack the peaceful glowing ones.

so long since the last late night long phone call. i've forgotten the feeling of it. dont feel like going to sleep. it's only 2.30am. 3.5hrs of sleep. ah well. i dislike one of tmr's lessons. and i dislike the work to be done this week. so irksome. sigh sigh. i shall try to just think about the nice french lesson. where got pple work from 8am to 8pm one. i need a labour union, student union useless one.

je suis assise ici, seule, si triste et solitaire.

hello everyone, i think i am very in character. i am so myself, at the moment. maybe i'll even start writing verse soon. hah. not like i have the time and leisure to do so. almost felt like one awhile back, but there's just not enough free time for it to develop. damn i really dont feel like sleeping. i am so put off by irksome lessons. why cant i have french lesson from 8am to 8pm.

SIGH...

a friend of my father has got sorta diagnosed with lung cancer. h.m.m. closest experience with cancer or any major illness that i have. ponders.

death. so close yet so far. so close yet not close enough.

Ron Korb : Ron Korb : Ron Korb

i finally heard Tokaido played 'live'. after so many years of madness over that tune. after all those crazy days. i still can't remember how i first heard it.
and it's the first time he's in singapore. and they brought him to nus. and other assorted weird places.
and i finally got a proper cd of his songs. after all those mp3s...
shall go listen more to him at DXO tmr.. tralala.
here starts another insane flute craze.
i want cheap bamboo flutes!

official website

=[

Ron Korb is coming to NUS! ahhh *scream*. (but i can't scream.)

amused. tralala.

ok, now im happy. even though i thought cholesterol was soluble.

leucine, proline, methionine, tryptophan, and a tear in the eye

dedicated to those in turmoil, to those growing up, to those seeking life, to those wondering wandering floundering. there was a young girl long ago.

There was a young girl long ago
Who lived a peaceful life untold
She understood that love was everything

The jungle took her far away
Where her daddy worked and she would play
With friends who taught her how to be a lady

She had no rings on her fingers
She had diamonds in her eyes
She had no money to be reckoned with
She had love within her life

And I heard her singing

CHORUS
Wouldn't you say
Wouldn't you say
Wouldn't you say
That life is beautiful

She sang of things that pleased her soul
She questioned life and made it known
She stored her knowledge deep inside her mind

She had no mansions on a hillside
She had castles in the sky
She had no gold for inheritance
She had time on her side

And I heard her singing

CHORUS

And as the years go by
That peaceful girl was I
And I'm still singing

CHORUS

Wouldn't you say
that life is beautiful

saw many many crabs in the mangrove today. live 'wild' crabs, =]
and also a water monitor lizard basking. and a few mud skippers.

the best crab was this one standing atop a mud lobster mound, and munching away. it was taking up stuff with its claws and eating. but it looked like it was eating mud. shrug. feeding crab!

yawnz

hongyi's bday party. october. the year of the 21st is 3/4 gone. glad to see him having his party. even though i spent more time talking to Neo. so much information about camp. so long since the last time anyone has talked about camp stuff. in some ways, it's the same things. the same cycles, the same changes. familiarity. so familiar, yet so distant, so foreign, so inconsquential.
but still, the madness in NUS is preventing me from caring too much about the rest of the world. more tests coming up. more lab reports. and why in the world did i forget to hand up my lab report today. i can't believe i actually did such a thing. spoilt my otherwise perfect day.

hello.