vendredi, janvier 09, 2004
   

and then too, i find out that life for some people, are not really worth much. TV, movie, food, shopping, magazine, TV, TV, TV, vcds, sleep, puns, pitiful jokes, lame teasing, alcohol, cigarettes, coffee, handphones, handphones, friendster, arcade games, neopets, soccer, TV, sleep. that just about sums up some people's lives. sadly. regretfully. apologetically.

is life worth much?

and then again, perhaps i have lived in too high circles without binoculars.

have you encountered a person, who's goal in life is to be a truck driver?
have you encountered people, who's idea of life after ORD, is to search the Classifieds for a part-time or full-time job.
jobs which we take up while waiting for school to start, can be a serious and real outlook for them.
have you seen them, who know that they get paid more if they stay on in army, compared to if they go out and work for a while.

i find. that it is cruel to rule. to decree with the underlying insinuation that people cannot or refuse to think for themselves. i have always utterly shunned from putting people on a lower intellectual level than me. i wish to treat all my friends equally, respectfullly, as was possible in RI. but in JC, it changed, there were those who were so hopeless in character that i could not delude myself to continuously believing they were capable of better. i truthfully do not like people saying im smart, or smarter, or whatever. it was something i grew up with, in RI, in JC. it is just so irritating. it was just sickening to hear that dreaded phrase 'creme de la creme'. perhaps then, everyone around me were good, everyone were like comparable. but it's just so sickening to be looking at other people and having to admit differences. i did not choose to grow up this way. what if we just stayed as gay country follk.

went to drop in on my sister's sec1 campfire. a neighbourhood sec sch. the principal, a moderate age but abnormally bubbly woman, was speaking. the whole setup had this rather childish air abt it. she treated them like small children. i don't know if i can rem my own experience correctly, but it was rather different in RI. perhaps the school, the sprawling campus, the stately timbers, the general atmosphere at RI was more respectful towards the students. different styles. different upbringings. categorization. expectation. nuture.

just like they treat different batches differently in BMT.

i suppose Osama was brought up differently. i don't suppose he had any other choice in his environment.

i didn't used to be so bitter, cynical, depressive, morbid, fatalistic.


Lord of the Rings Online!
Level 47 Elf Hunter Vindyamiriel

song of the moment:
de Jax
孙燕姿 - 雨天
周杰伦 - 珊瑚海


林俊杰&金莎 - 被风吹过的夏天
Kitaro - Symphony of Dreams
James Blunt - You Are Beautiful
Clannad - Seachran Charn Tsiail
Céline Dion - En attendant ses pas
ASIE - Et puis la terre
陈奕迅 - 十年
Yanni - Before I Go
Céline Dion/Garou - Sous le vent Dido - White Flag
梁静茹 - 如果有一天 [歌/词]
Natalie Imbruglia - Torn

6 km

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